READ MY LIPS.

Today would be so perfect if not for the ending.
I lost it. Again.

I really wish i could turn back time and go back to the period where we weren't quarreling so often, when i wasn't being such a bad gf to him. Things wouldn't be the way they are now then.
I'll never forget how it feels like to be in his arms at night. The days we spent watching the world cup, cooking instant noodles at 3am, how i'd wait for him to return from clubbing and i'd take care of him cos he was tipsy, how he.. urgh, the list won't end.
It hurts alot to see that 'Darling' now refers to someone else. In my past relationships, i never called my bf darling, dear or whatever. So it's like that special to me. But to him, ha..
It crushed me when i got to know of some stuff yesterday, my heart literally felt like it was tightening.


When i was working at Citigroups, there was once when he was supposed to meet me after work but when i called he said that he'd just gotten up and was at home.
So i started complaining, and suddenly his arm came wrapping over my shoulder. Nothing big but very sweet. Really really made my day.
Today reminded me of then.

you used to complain when my friendster status was 'single', and i was like, it's only friendster, why you care so much. Now, it hurts to see that you've removed our pictures and the only thing keeping me from gg crazy is that you havent changed your status. I know that when you eventually do change it, i'll be crying buckets again, Unless the one you're gonna be 'in a relationship' with is me. haha.
wait long long amelia.

i thought i'd gotten on already, we were talking like friends. It's become a habit to send you morning messages and it doesnt matter already whether or not you reply cos i know i've told you how i feel. When you got nice to me, all that came to my mind was just you and me. Until a couple of days ago, a thought came to my mind to remind me that there's another party, and i'm just the nobody.
Everytime i think of you and her, i can't help imagining what you're doing at that point of time, thinking whatever you're doing w her, we should be doing tgt instead. Those thoughts can kill.
I wish i could listen to my friends and not think too much. I did so, but it's coming back again.
Do you still look at our pictures and think of those sweet memories?
Been missing you really badly, come back come back, would you.
I'm not that strong, i'll fall one day. Soon.
You're pushing me back into depression boy. why wont you just return?

If I lay here ,If I just lay here. Would you lie with me and just forget the girl world